Dumbest Stuff On Wheels, Love In The Wild, and Rescue Me

Elissa Bass is on vacation in a place with no cable and no Internet. She will return on Aug. 28.

Dumbest Stuff On Wheels, 8 p.m., Speed

I would have thought this show would be more about the worst ideas for automobiles, like the one about the Humvee needing a civilian model. Instead, it seems to be about stupid drivers. Tonight, “drivers wreak havoc on the interstate and at a car wash; pocket-sized vehicles cause major damage.”

Love in the Wild, 10 p.m., NBC

Because dating doesn’t have enough pitfalls as it is, this show decides to add some literal ones. It seems that instead of setting up a meeting for coffee with someone you meet online, you go down to Costa Rica and get attacked by bats and crocodiles. Still sounds better than some of the dates I’ve been on…

Rescue Me, 10 p.m., FX

When this show ends this year, I think they should do a spin-off called Lou to focus on beloved Lieutenant Kenny Shea and all the happenings in the firehouse, always the strongest part of any episode. Granted, FX might have to cancel their comedy Louie to avoid confusion, but since one of Elissa’s vacation excuses was that the network had kidnapped her and forced her to enjoy that show I think she’d approve.