Marathon runner and exercise physiologist Amanda Zaleski gives tips on how to be the perfect spectator at a road race. Pro tip: Do not send pictures of margaritas to the runner. It never ends well.
"When are you going to be done? My feet hurt from standing here," my (now) husband texted me during my first marathon. I'm not a sensitive gal, but I couldn't help but be a little resentful when I looked up at all of the other significant others proudly raising witty and loving sentiments on jumbo poster boards. I don't ever forecast that my husband will join me on a 26.2 mile jaunt, but this was a shocking contrast to what I had expected. It wasn't until I stood on the sidelines at this years Hartford Marathon that I realized that HE didn't know what to expect either. How could he? I've concluded that the perfect spectator is a runner, themselves. But, that doesn't let my husband off the hook, quite yet. I've compiled a list of 26 tips to all of our loving and supporting family, friends and significant others (ahem, Jay) who will be toeing the (side) lines this Fall.
I know you think we are so awesome and that running for hours is no big deal, but it actually is. We just don't complain about it because... well, we are awesome. All jokes aside, today is the culmination of months of training, restrictions, overcome injuries and mental strength. It means much more to us than you think, so please:
1. DO NOT moan when the alarm goes off and we turn on the lights come race day. We don't want to get up either.
2. DO go online. Go to "Information for Spectators." Read the "Information for Spectators." There are so many amazing bands and DJ's. Pick one. Sit there. Enjoy yourself.
3. DO let us talk about how hungry we are taper week. DO buy us a fancy carb loaded meal to celebrate our training success. Dessert mandatory.
4. DO NOT make a sign that says, "Go FIRST NAME." We deserve more than that.
5. DO NOT complain when you see our iTunes bill. At Mile 20, music is our only friend.
6. DO map out different locations to see us along the course. You don't watch 5 seconds of a baseball game and you don't watch 5 seconds of a marathon. Be creative! If family and friends are coming, facilitate spreading everyone out along the course.
7. DO NOT make fun of our water belts in front of other runners in Fleet Feet. We are skinny, but we roll in packs.
8. DO stalk us via Athlete Tracking software. Stalking = Love.
9. DO tell us where AND WHAT SIDE OF THE ROAD you are going to be. DO NOT make us turn down our Ke$ha so that we can look and listen for you.
10. DO NOT send us pictures of delicious margaritas. That doesn't help.
11. DO confirm a post-race reunion plan before the race begins and DO NOT ask "what happened" when I arrive 10 minutes off my projected time.
12. DO bring us treats and water to give as a token of your affection for during the race (jellybeans, bananas, jolly ranchers, starburst) as well as after (grilled cheese, bagel with cc, banana, and fruit snacks)
13. DO NOT eat our honey stingers, sports beans or GU's.
14. DO send us cards in the mail after the race. We are probably very depressed, let down and upset with ourselves. We are never happy with our race.
15. We are never happy with our race.
16. DO NOT tell us about your cousin's, teacher's, boyfriend's neighbor who ran the Boston, London and Chicago Marathon's all under 3 hours and all in the same year.
17. DO NOT let us forget to bring baby wipes the morning of the race and DO NOT ask what they are for.
18. DO NOT make fun of how we walk to the beer tent. We don't care how we get there, just get us there.
19. DO NOT buy us flowers. This is not a middle school band concert. Beer. Beer would be a nice gesture.
20. DO NOT buy our race photos. DO NOT send said race photos to other people. We know what we looked like. We do not need to be reminded. Taboo Keywords: FACE, RACE, PACE.
21. DO bring an extra sweatshirt for us. Preferably the very nice one you bought at the expo to surprise us with.
22. DO arrange race day logistics so that we do not have to drive/walk home. That is just very cruel.
23. DO be supportive of our sacrifices. If we want to give up coffee/chocolate/alcohol/House Hunter binge sessions then support that. We will be back. Oh we will be back.
24. DO run part of the course with me even if it is for 10 seconds. It means more to us than you will ever know. DONT tell us we are almost done. We don't like to hear that until 26ish miles.
25. DO hug us like you mean it when we cross the finish line because although this may not be our first or last marathon, nothing compares to the feeling of seeing your family and loved ones after enduring something so mentally and physically challenging, which is what makes us keep going back for more.
26. Lastly, your feet do not hurt. DO treat us to a pedicure.
0.2 Bonus points if you come and bring margaritas.
